Dusty

This place is becoming old news now. I don't feel the same way that I used to about this. It's saddening to me, but I guess it might be time to move on and forget about this. I am no longer comfortable here, but I've never been comfortable with myself. I'm not sure what to expect.

How

Probably the most profound way to open up a song, let alone an entire album. The Neighbourhood aren't vague about what they are trying to communicate.

How

"How could you question God's existence?
When you question God himself?"

I've come to the realization (over a long period of time)
that I need to continue to record and make music

I know I'm not happy with where it is at right now, but if I don't keep doing it how am I supposed to get better

I am going through a time in my life where it's hard to care about a lot of things for some reason
I hope the few of you that read this know that I'm sorry for being a burden sometimes
I don't wish to be like that, and I want to change, I just want to progress

Sorry if this is all vague. I don't really know exactly what I'm writing sometimes, but I jot down as I go.

This is less of a poetic blog then it is a gathering of thoughts.
I'm ok with that

Sleeping Angel

Svefn-G-Englar

You won't be intimidated by the length once you start listening

PS   Bailey this should cure your dislike of them

Some do

It wasn't until now that I came to the realization that
The reason I don't have friends isn't because I'm shy
It's because people don't like me
Including myself
I don't really understand how people do it
How they wake up in the morning excited
How people are ok with who they are
I've never understood the concept of friendship or being a friend
I don't know how to be a functioning member of a family
Everything I thought I knew about being a person is all a lie
I don't have anybody/anything to say I'm a part of
Everything I do, anything I'm a part of, is something where I try to convince myself I'm not sad
I used to think everybody had a problem with me, not to realize that I am the problem.
Recently I thought about seeing a therapist to tell me there was a scientific reason there was something wrong with me
I thought I had bi-polar disorder
But I don't have anything, I'm just fucked in the head
Why do I even pressure myself with the burden of trying

Alan

David Firth is a name that describes a person I've never met, but somebody I feel like I can relate to. It's unsettling in many ways. I don't understand how my taste in music or art is so similar to somebody I've never met. I was able to recognize all of the music after watching this. I do hope one day fate will bring us together, just like it has in the past.

Alan

Aphex Twin
Godspeed You! Black Emperor
Sigur Ros

Bipolarity

The Hierarchy of Needs is a placebo.

Sorry for the negativity and lack of inspiration on my blog and my life. I'm sincerely trying my best to stop worrying about the past and look to the future.